#18 – A Good Boy

Black Shuck is a massive, black, spectral hound who haunts the churchyards and winding lanes of Fenland, and made particularly memorable impressions on the churches of Bungay and Blythburgh on 4 August 1577. He is said to be a harbinger of doom – to see him is to know you’re likely to die within the year (apparently, if you hear him, you should close your eyes). With one theory being that Shuck is a remnant of Odin’s Wild Hunt, I wondered what that might be like…

I only want someone to call my name –
The one He gave, not scucca, Shug, or Shuck.
Abandoned in this marsh to untrimmed fame,
Without Him by my side, it seems I’m stuck.

These flatland folk can’t see me save at night,
And when they do, they’re never any fun –
They never want to play, or hunt, or fight;
They only want to whimper, freeze, or run.

But I was trained to hold strait to my course,
To stick and strive until the job’s complete.
If I can show I’m fast as any horse,
Then maybe He’ll return and give me treats.

Until He rides this way I’ll haunt this fen,
And howl alone until I’m Pack again.

–FR

The original, identikit picture of Black Shuck looks more like a ram than a dog. This is cuter, trust me. Source.

#16 - Sweet Peas

Peter Kropotkin (1842–1921) Russian revolutionary and philosopher

Oi, Galton, you relentless fucking twat,
This Social Darwinism is a con!
You’ve had your fun, but now I smell a rat –
Your competition theory is all wrong.

Cooperation is the way to thrive,
A concept that you don’t seem to confront.
So, sod off with this ‘man’s combative drive’!
Coz property is theft, you fucking cunt!

Injustice can be fought with conflict, sure,
But conflict’s not the impetus for change.
Anarcho-communism is the cure –
Let’s tear the State apart and re-engage!

So, join a commune, grow your own sweet peas!
And quit with the eugenics, Galton, please?

LM