25 February 2021

#25 - The Proper Paperwork

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy is a sci-fi novel by Douglas Adams. It follows Arthur Dent, the last surviving human man, and his adventures after the Earth is demolished by aliens (to make way for a hyperspace bypass). It’s one of the most bureaucratic, frustrating and unnecessary ways for the world to end, which is why I’m quite fond of it. 

The Proper Paperwork 

I understand why you’re a tad annoyed,
but there’s no need to whine and be a jerk.
I’m sorry that your planet’s been destroyed;
you should’ve filed the proper paperwork.

The bypass has to go through hyperspace.
Now, surely, we can all agree on that?
It looked like such a dreadful little place – 
your planet wasn’t even on the map! 

You’ll have to find another spot to live.
(It’s not like you can settle locally.) 
You’ll have to learn to hitchhike and forgive:
it’s not as bad as Vogon poetry. 

So, try to find the bright sky in your scowl.
Get on your way, and don’t forget your towel.


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